On a coaching call recently, one of the people I work with admitted he was nervous about messaging people.

He wasn't talking about strangers. He meant people who had already liked or commented on his posts.

When we dug into it, the reason went back a long way. A previous coach had him sending cold outreach on LinkedIn. One person replied that they could see him coming a mile away, that what he was doing was gross, and that he should get lost. (He used saltier language.)

He had no bad intentions. He wanted to help people, but that one reply taught him that offering help is an intrusion.

If you haven't launched yet, you might carry a version of the same picture. You imagine selling means pestering strangers until somebody gives in, so you'd rather not start at all.

Here's the truth: cold outreach is brutal, and I don't encourage it.

What I told him is that warm conversations are a different game. When someone likes or comments on what you share, they've already raised their hand. They've told you that what you're talking about matters to them.

So you're not selling to them. You're routing them to the right next step.

That starts with two simple questions. Where are you right now? Where do you want to get to?

Then you point them to the next best step for them. Sometimes that's a free community, and sometimes it's a call. If they take it, that's great, and if they don't, that's fine too.

Most people won't reply, and you don't need them to. The ones who do reply usually lead to really good conversations.

Underneath all of it sits one belief. You have to believe you can genuinely help these people. Once you know that, a message stops feeling like a pitch and starts feeling like an offer of help.

He left the call saying it would feel uncomfortable for a while, but he knew he'd grow through it. Nobody finds it natural at first, and it gets easier with every conversation you have.

The goal is not to get comfortable with selling. The goal is to get comfortable offering help to people who have already shown they want it.

Simon

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